The workplace consists of people working towards a common goal. The goal is to achieve the company’s mission. It’s funny though that no matter how good everyone’s intention may be, conflicts will sometimes arise. So, what do you do when it does rear its ugly head in your workplace? How about mediate? That’s right…talk it out.
When administered correctly mediation can enable your organization to…
- Preserve work relationships
- Garner employees’ trust
- Facilitate opposing sides’ ability to see the other’s perspective
- Reach resolution much more quickly
Mediation is the least confrontational way of addressing differences in the workplace. Whether the conflict is between employees, managers, or a combination of employees and managers, mediation allows willing participants to avoid the further deterioration of their workplace relationship. Even when the parties involved are unable to find a “happy medium” and must walk away from the table after agreeing to disagree, they can sometimes still work together successfully. Over time, relationships may even mend. I personally witnessed this during a mediation that I facilitated. An employee asked human resources to help her address the problems that she and her manager were experiencing working together. She felt that her manager was not interacting with her in a productive manner that allowed her to be effective in performing her job. She also felt that he communicated with her through a colleague instead of speaking with her directly. The manager graciously agreed to meet and acknowledge some ways in which he could have handled their workplace interactions differently. He also shared that he felt that the employee had been insubordinate towards him in an open forum with other team members present. While meeting with the two of them, I learned he felt that he had been backed against a wall because his superior had been pulling his employee to work on other projects without considering how it could potentially impact his team’s performance. I also learned that the manager traveled a lot for work, so during his limited time in the office, he interacted with the employee who was physically present. Subsequently, he often asked that employee to relay work-related information to the employee who felt that she was being dismissed. During mediation, each person expressed their feelings about the state of their work relationship and promised to be more aware of how their actions made the other person feel. I am happy to say that they are now working together successfully.
All employee concerns will not lead to a formal complaint; however, when left unaddressed, they can become very serious. I have seen an employee’s simple request for their manager’s accommodation related to a health condition being triggered by something in their work area, go unaddressed. While the manager ignores the employee’s request, the employee has time to think about other instances when he/she made a request and felt ignored. Before you know it, that simple, straight-forward request, turns into a charge of discrimination. Now, the manager may not have been able to do more than have the building services staff check the employee’s office to see if they could determine the cause of the employee’s raised concern; however, that simple action would have let the employee know that he/she had been heard and taken seriously. That would have made the employee feel as if their manager cared about them and how comfortable their work environment is to them. Conversely, I have seen complaints of discrimination deescalate to where the employee returned to Human Resources to withdraw their charge, not because they felt intimidated by the person whom they filed the complaint against, but because they both agreed to mediation, got to common ground, appropriate apologies were offered and accepted, so there was no need to continue with the charge. When employees begin to feel valued it helps the employer to gain its employees’ trust and employee engagement increases. That is another win-win outcome.
The goal of mediation is to help the parties involved see the situation from the other person’s perspective. Sometimes we don’t understand a person’s actions, but once we learn about the point of view from which they are assessing a situation, we begin to understand better. You may remember that in my last post I shared that I had the awesome opportunity to participate in the “7 Habits of Highly Effective People” training. Our facilitator shared several videos of Dr. Covey explaining different aspects of the training and providing examples of how the training applied to us all. During one of the videos of Dr. Covey, he recounted a time when he was riding the subway train and a father with his three young children boarded. The children ran around making noise and disturbing other riders, but the father seemed oblivious to it. Dr. Covey said that he told the father that his children were disturbing other riders and asked him if he was going to do something about it. The man then replied that he and his children had just left the hospital where his wife, their mother, had died and that he guessed the behavior that the children were displaying was the only way they knew to deal with their loss. He added that he didn’t even know how to deal with it himself. Of course, not only did Dr. Covey feel terrible about what he said to the father, but he saw the situation from the man’s and his children’s perspective and now he totally understood the reason for his children’s actions and his inaction.
Another pro of mediation is that, with willing participants, it can resolve the complaint in a much shorter period of time than an investigation can. Investigations are much more stressful than mediations. At most, I have had a mediation that lasted two days with periodic follow-up. Investigations, on the other hand, can last several weeks to months. Also, in order for the investigator to make a sound determination, he/she must interview witnesses. This involves other people who would not be involved during the mediation process. So, the investigation then risks the possibility that someone will discuss the issue with others who not a part of the process. Even if they don’t discuss it with anyone, they know details about the situation that they would otherwise likely not have known. That can create an uncomfortable workplace situation for both the complainant, the respondent, and those interviewed.
As you can probably tell, I am a big fan of mediation vs. investigations because of the healthy nature of the former process. Now, I will be the first to admit that some complaints need to be investigated, so please don’t misunderstand me. While in a perfect world, everyone would just get along and play nice together…that is not reality. So, since we all know that conflicts in the workplace will continue to arise, I encourage employers to have a conflict resolution process in place that allows both sides to at least attempt to resolve their differences amicably, which is a win-win for all involved when it is successful. If possible, mediate, don’t investigate.
